There is an old adage: “We are our own worst critic.” While it is often profoundly true, there are also too many instances where we go from being our own critic to being our own bully. So many of us are guilty of kicking our own ass, and it’s a cycle that we need to stop. 

It’s normal to experience disappointment, even in ourselves. It’s okay to notice when we are not meeting our expectations. But there is a point at which we become so unkind to ourselves that our behavior becomes self-destructive. That behavior can range from outright self-sabotage to more subtle patterns and bad habits. In this episode we talk about the many ways we kick our own ass, and how we can put an end to it. 

We talk about the stories that we tell ourselves about our work and lives, and the often outsized sense of importance we place on our roles in them. We talk about the myth we often believe that our actions are so powerful that they leave an imprint on the world that cannot be undone. We discuss how these narratives distort the way we view ourselves and cause us to catastrophize our situations. There is a difference between saying, “I screwed up”, and “I’m a screw up” – and we get into why that difference matters so much in how we treat ourselves. 

We also dispel the myth that work must hurt – that we must work ourselves to exhaustion for fear of believing that we haven’t worked hard enough. We do not have to work to depletion, we do not have to be perfect, and little of what we do is permanent. 

Throughout the episode we offer tips, coaching tools and questions, and perspective designed to help change the way we approach our situations and, more importantly, ourselves – especially when things aren’t going our way. All of this so we can stop kicking our own ass.

You can listen to the episode on our website: www.insidejobthepodcast.com or on your favorite podcast platform. Follow us on social media (all over @insidejobpodcast) for ongoing discussions and articles related to this topic. 

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Resources We Mentioned:

• Jim Carrey in “Liar Liar”

• The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk, MD

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